Rhapsody in the blue

Wealthy people of Chicago you are being duped.

On a recent outing to the Chicago Symphony buildings we caught ourselves wanting dinner before the concert. Upon finding our usual Loop-eateries packed solid, we looked for other options for a sit-down dinner. We'd been to Rhapsody before, the bar for a drink, and thought, "It's right there, let's just go and we'll be so close to the concert hall after."

Sitting down looking at the menu was not a shock, downtown can get pricey, but I figured that the ingredients and the creative sounding plates would hold up to the asking price. Having just eaten an extremely late lunch with friends, I looked to the pastas and the small-plate starters. The pastas were, at the time of our visit, $18-19, and the starters between $8-14. I thought this was a little steep on the noodling end, and again my mind went to give them the benefit of the doubt. Even the prices on the wine were suspect. My husband was reccomended one of the higher priced glasses (at $14/glass, all reds were between $12-15) that he was told would compliment his pasta.

We ordered first a side of Brussels sprouts, acompanied by pancetta and balsamic, the menu said. I chose for myself a small-plate of braised rabbit with someone's Nonna's gnocchi. And the Husband chose the boar ragu with hand cut pappardelle - a favorite of his when we eat out.

THE FOOD CAME.

Brussels Sprouts: DROWNED in raw balsamic vinegar. They looked like once they might have even tasted good. They had a nice...shade of brown about them... Someone must have switched the bottle of reduction with the Heinz bottle in the back, they were soaking with the stuff. We each tried to suck it up and finish the bowl but they were, simply put, gross, and we would have sent them back but at this point we were on a time crunch for the performance (something this restaurant works with all the time being literally connected to the symphony).

Husband's Boar Ragu: BO(A)RING. What was once beautiful boar was ground into a substance that easily could have been ground turkey for all we know. No flavor save for the unopressed saccharine tomato of the sauce. Just tomato, it was unfortunate because the "hand cut" pappardelle were actually good, great in fact. There was no meat flavor anywhere. Chef, you should save your restaurant the Boar-Bill and just get some ground beef/pork because, quite honestly, the boar is lost. It tasted like the cooks gave up on this one. A Ragu is not difficult, but apparently it's too much to deal with for a restaurant charging $19 for Chef Boyardee's secret recipe. The secret is worth being kept, trust me.

Nonna's Gnocchi and Rabbit: Someone's Nonna is rolling in her grave. Her gnocchi have been wrecked. MUSH, barely flavorful. I say to the cook, for shame, that Nonna's memory deserves better. The rabbit was good though,  thank God, and the sauce pleasurably spicy, though all you really got from the sauce was the heat, actually maybe that's a good thing. But the gnocchi. I mean, sad pandas. The kittens in the street weep for these once-pillowy gems. I'm surprised they were able to get them on the plate without disintegration.

Oh and the wine was NOT a good match for the tomato-obsessed sauce. It would have been a good match for a meat-focused sauce. But alas...

Lesson learned. A poor experience from a place that is frequented by this city's elite, the wealthy patrons of the Chicago Symphony Orchestra (oh, and the guy next to us who was coming from a cubs game who kept saying that the wine was cleansing his palate, and his wife -or mistress- who looked like she was in a circle of hell having to partake in conversation with him). So I say again, what did we take away from Rhapsody? Drowned Boring Mush. Eek. That sounds harsh, but sadly true. If a restaurant can't even manage Brussels sprouts appropriately something is seriously outta wack. But really, who I feel worse for are the unfortunate little rich people being forced to not only eat such underwhelming food, but pay out the nose for it. Poor you.